Animation
Concept: Cats can't fly.
Seven sentences:
1. Cat climbs up a tree.
2. Cat gets near top branches, they start swaying in wind.
3. Cat almost falls, and scrapes its way back to sturdy branches.
4. Cat studies weak branches, grabs one.
5. Branch is pulled back to sling the cat into air.
6. Cat flies through the air, dreaming
it's chasing after a bird by flying with wings.
7. Cat lands right in front of a dog house.
Mind Map:
http://i199.photobucket.com/albums/aa209/wildkat137/kakosey_mindmap.jpg?t=1189027983
There is no color for the mind map because there is a lack of colored pencils in my posession at the moment.
3 comments:
i like your story and idea but i think u could do a little more with the begging and end, like in the begging u should show the cat watching birds flying and maybe trying to jump and catch a low flying one or he chases one and it flys away , then he gets the idea to climb the tree then the dream would make more sense to me. and i dunno if i like the ending of landing infront of a dog house. maybe the cat catches the bird in his dream and then he snaps out of it and hes really caught something else. i dunno what else he could catch but i just think u could do a little more with the end, its a very good idea though, id be scared of flying cats lol
The end is very confusing it doesn't seem like the cat planned anything tis is just there climbing the tree. Start by making the character come up with a plan. Also when writing don't plan out every action of the character that leads to less space to be creative and interesting. Sentence 6 and 7 are good they are good ending it seems to me that your ending is what you had down the most and though it has been down hundreds of times before it still could work. But find your own approach to the ending of the story. Right now it seems that you are working from things that you've seen done before. Thats great for reference but that is not good enough when looking to something that has been done and in the end just ending like every story is not going to do. Sorry to say but its been done look for something new to end it with. May be instead of a dog house we end it with something like a pool and then the cat lands in the pool and is sitting at the bottom grumbling under his breath. Something that is not over vied and over used. Again the beginning is open and is confusing has no idea what the character is doing just drops the audience into the situation at hand. Also what age market are you looking to go for that is another big thing when writing a story what is your target audience. IS it little kids, adults, artist, politicians, the list goes on so just choose an audience and rethink how to approach it with this in mind. Other wise it is a good description of the story but lacks the draw of a story.
In brief
The introduction of your character flows nicely. However I have one big question? What is the cats motivation for climbing up the tree? Perhaps, a shine ribbon, or a tiny chipmunk. Moving along, the action that ensues afterwards is done smoothly. Yet
the cat being flung into the air by the tree branch has been done many times before. Lastly, the ending is a bit cliche as it is a much over used technique
when dealing with cats and dogs. Also you may have unknowingly just killed off your man character. You could still go with this ending but perhaps a unique twist will
help out. Such as the dog fall in love with the cat. In sum the introduction of the character needs a bit more info for the views and the ending needs a little work.
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